I.B. Leevit

The untimely death of Inis Bradford Leevit brings to an end an era of unique and creative thinking that has spanned many centuries.  The Leevit family has long been considered as one of the most influential families on the planet.  Family members throughout recorded history were constant contributors to humanity with their endless innovations and inventions.  Based on recent pre-historic cave drawings discovered in eastern Waxahatchie, it is believed that the family may have been affecting lives around the world even before recorded history.  Some of the more well known contributions that the Leevit family lay claim to are:

- The invention of the 90 degree angle which literally opened up an infinite number of doors, including of course the invention of the corner, square door frame and cinder blocks.

- The discovery of the spherical shape commonly known today as "round".  As we all know this led to the transition from square ball bearings to round ball bearings and machinery became leap years more efficient almost over night.

- In the early days of the automobile there became a need for a pneumatic tire to better fit the comfort and handling needs of the rapidly advancing automotive industry.  This tire is now a staple in the industry.  It is well documented in automotive history that the late Buddy Eldridge Leevit was the individual who invented the flat tire.  This moment in history is also believed to be the moment of birth to a whole slew of four-letter and multi-hyphenated curse words that Mr. B.E. Leevit also holds claim to.

- Ken Ulysis Bradford Leevit worked in the office two doors down and across town from Albert Einstein.  He had gone on record numerous times crediting his proximity to Albert Einstein as the motivating force behind his research into black holes that form inside the brain.  His controversial conclusion that females with blond hair and Mexican tequila were the most frequent sources of these cranial anomalies, almost cost him his medical certification.

Based on eye witness reports, and the lack of any remaining facial hair on the victim, it was determined that despite evidence of a prior facial application of SPF 50 sunblock, death occurred when Mr. Inis B. Leevit was hit in the face by a solar flare.  It is reported that I.B. Leevit's lasts words, only moments before the incident, were a tribute to his late great grand father B.E. Leevit and his respective moment in history.