Dreams

In going through my iTunes library, looking for a specific song, I caught my mind remembering faces and names of past friends as I looked over the almost 10,000 songs in my library.  After about the third time this happened, I stopped and opened up a new playlist and started shuffling these provocative songs into the folder.  Now that I was aware of what my brain was doing, it became the most interesting and at times emotional, form of mind game that I had ever experienced.  And these amazing things that were going through my mind, were real.  Real people and real experiences in my life.  As always, I began to evaluate what it was, about these specific memories in life, that made them so incredibly ingrained in my memory and why, for some reason, each of these memories had its own "theme song" associated with it in my mind. 

The simple answer was that each and every one of these memories were events and experiences that had happened for the first time.  They had happened with a close friend or someone who had gained close ties to my soul, even if those ties were only for a short period of time.  It was a memory of something as simple as having the best night ever while out on the town or it could be something a lot less simple such as a sexual relationship with a discretionless nymphomaniac. 

The more complicated and theoretical answer could be that perhaps it is during these "first time mind expanding experiences", new neurons are formed and become principle building blocks for future information and decision making.  Being the first building block would mean that the memory would be more prevalent than other memories and would always be with us as long as that neuron or neural pathway was alive.

What ever the true answer may be, one conclusion is for sure.  Dreams keep us alive.  They keep a lust for life and living in our souls.  The thrill of the chase as we do the things that we only "dreamed" of doing before.  With the results of those dreams being so solidly forged in our minds, they give us the ability to look back at the experience and draw wisdom for ourselves and others (especially after achieving some of those "best nights ever" out on the town).  Being able to hear the "theme song" that reminds us of that specific exciting event, is the factor that ties it all together.  It sings out to us letting us know that for an achievement in life to occur, all we have to do is dream.

Hero

That song was played today.  The song that at one time was so powerful and meaningful that it motivated you to perform impossible acts.  Now when it plays, it hurts.  It really hurts.  It reaches deep down into your soul, where it was allowed to enter from the very beginning, and it pushes its agony outwards in all directions.

If you want to move mountains, find a severely depressed person that is desperate to reach a target, and give them a good song.  They will go to the ends of the earth and accomplish anything, while that song is playing.  Building a relationship while being depressed is no exception.  As with any blooming relationship, it can even be somewhat beautiful to watch, on the surface.  However, below the surface, this "moving of mountains" by a depressed person, is actually an "all or nothing" approach to the challenge.  Maybe even a "do or die" approach.  If they are successful, welcome them back to life.  If they are not successful, start digging the grave.

There are people in this world that are lost in life if they do not surround themselves with drama and controversy.  They become so accustomed to it that they actually seek it out or do things, usually in the form of lying, cheating or stealing, to bring it about.  Low self-esteem is one component in the lives of these people that cause them to be this way.  They may profess that they want out of a horrible life that they are in, but they cannot do it.  They can even try to live a more controlled and sane life, but it never lasts for long.  

Some people simply do not want to be rescued.  Mountains can be moved and a million pounds of soul forced effort can be summoned and invested in building a relationship with this person, only to watch them walk away from their own salvation.  As they walk away, they know that it is the wrong thing to do and even cry a river of tears as they do it, but they cannot keep themselves from turning their back on sanity.  They walk right back into that hell and they destroy the life that was there to save their life and in fact had already saved their life.

I can be your hero, baby. 
I can kiss away the pain.  
I will stand by you forever.  
You can take my breath away.

Chicago

Throughout my life, there were so many distant places that had always seemed out of reach for me. Many of those places were cities and states that, for various unfounded reasons, I had no desire to visit anyway. When I accepted my dream job with a hotel management company, I didn’t realize that most of my preconceived notions were about to be changed. Before experiencing Chicago for myself, I could never have dreamed about the wonderment that the city possessed. I saw Chicago as an example of all the many wonderful people, places, and things that are in existence in this world and that I had been missing out on. My horizons were expanded and my eyes opened.

 My trip to Chicago occurred during the Christmas holiday season, which only amplified an already amazing encounter. The people I saw and came in contact with were friendly and giving. The incredibly tall buildings were amazing. It seemed almost impossible to imagine all the expertise, planning and back breaking labor that must have gone into the construction of the buildings that were all around me. Even though I was in Chicago for work, I sensed that I must set aside some time one evening for exploration of the surrounding area.

 That evening as I strolled out the hotel’s front doors and into the cool crisp evening air, I felt alive with anticipation. It was already dark outside and the busy streets were lined with trees covered in small sparkling white lights to add to the atmosphere of the holiday season. As I walked down the sidewalk I could see the vapor from each living breath I took as I soaked in each encounter. Holiday music was playing everywhere. Outside each and every shop and department store was a different sampling of a Christmas carol or holiday tune. Outside one store was a group of makeshift musicians who were playing for tips. I was fascinated by the drummer who was using a plastic, five gallon bucket that he would lift up a down with one foot to make the various percussion sounds. Several people had gathered around and were listening to the musicians, adding a friendly and human element to the music.

As the journey continued, I made notice of the fact that there were many people walking up and down the sidewalks as they went about their tasks for the evening. Many beautiful women were out and about, possibly walking home from work or on a trip to the store. Most of them were tall and somewhat slender with long coats and cute toboggan like hats. I was drawn to their presence and on one occasion went out of my way to walk through the soft vapor cloud of a breath that was left behind by a gorgeous brunette. I had to turn and look over my shoulder after smelling the beautiful perfume that the powerful little breath cloud seemed to contain.

It was quite amazing walking down a sidewalk for several blocks with stretching high-rise buildings all around. The hotel where I was working was located on the historic Magnificent Mile and is surrounding by many majestic skyscrapers. I came upon the John Hancock building, which is second in height only to the Sears Tower. I decided to enter the building and take advantage of the observation deck near the top of the building. From the observation deck, I observed one of the most breathtaking sites I have ever seen. Stretching out for miles in several directions was an endless stream of lights. It was as if I was residing in the middle of a star and all the rays of light were radiating out from below me. What a great little exploration for the evening.  It had worked up an appetite and given me an excuse to take advantage of The Cheesecake Factory, a restaurant at the foot of the building. 

The following day, I topped off the adventure by hailing a taxi for the first time in my life, and then taking a trip to the Sears Tower. The Sears Tower was the tallest building in the United States and second tallest in the world at the time. Looking out the window, everything feels so distant. I felt as if I were peacefully isolated in a glass ball, hovering over one thousand feet above the city. I caught myself remembering a scene in Ferris Beullers Day Off when the actors were in the Sears Tower with their heads against the glass, looking down at the city below.

What an incredible and unexpectedly rewarding trip. My visit to Chicago marked a turning point in the way I thought about people, places, and things. The trip opened my mind and allowed me access to more places and experiences that came my way soon afterwards.

Technologicaly Advanced Out of Existance

World history can be a very interesting and thought provoking topic.  More so in the areas of archeology and anthropology.  Where did we come from?  There is so much more to human history than just the last 80 years or so that each of us will personally experience.  Things were not always the way they are now and they will not be the same in another 80 years. 

History tells us that at one time people believed the world was flat and if you thought anything different you were formidably ridiculed.  Now it is common knowledge that the earth is not flat nor does it have the sun revolving around it.  Some of the common knowledge of today's society could have gotten you killed if you even mentioned such in days gone by.  Change is inevitable and the knowledge base we have today will not always be an accurate point of reference for future humanity.

When an ancient city is discovered, there is the expectation that the people who occupied the city were less civilized, relative to our current day knowledge base, and based on the fact that they were unable to keep their city from being covered up with thousands of years of dirt.  When looking for proof of advanced technology, some would be looking for DVDs and laptop computers, for example, as evidence of such.  These are items relative to current technological points of reference.  80 years ago no one had even dreamed of a DVD or a laptop computer and would have had a different reference base for forming opinions.  80 years ago, people who might be looking for the ways ancient people communicated would have been looking for writing instruments common to what were known at that time.  Today, we now know that a pencil is not the only way to write or communicate in a written manner.  These examples change the base for comparison that would be considered in deciding whether are not the people of that city had technology.

That strange looking "rock", that was found while digging a drainage ditch in the back yard, could very well be the laptop computer type technology of a previous civilization.  We would not know what it is because we assume that no one before us had technology, and because this tangible piece of evidence can be dismissed as a rock.  Perhaps this rock is an artifact from a previously booming civilization here on earth, that had advanced to the point where they had no need for electrical power lines or roads, for example.  Perhaps they didn't have or need these things to begin with.  Why would a previous civilization have the same means of power and mobilization that we do?  Nature has no set rules about how different civilizations in different eras must evolve in the same manner.

Historic writings, drawings and of course construction, are indicators of past civilizations.  Some of these items suggest the existence of advanced technology but little if anything, that we would perceive as technology, is usually found.  It is the tangible evidence that is being sought out.  The tangible evidence is what we base our perceptions and opinions on.  If the civilization that we currently live in was to somehow cease to exist and 10,000 years later be discovered by another evolved civilization, they would have no idea that we had wireless communications.  The invisible radio waves would be long gone and the source of the transmissions would no longer be transmitting.  They would more than likely come across some well preserved library books and maybe some headstones in a cemetery and that would become their opinion as to the extent of our communication.  We know that forming their opinions about us based on these findings is not true but how would they know that?  Naturally with further studies and investigation they would begin to arrive at different opinions, just as we do today when we study civilizations of the past.

As time passes and technology advances, more facts about life and past life become obvious.  As technology advances, fewer and fewer tangible evidences of many of those technologies, exist.  Could it be possible that the technology used by a civilization could advance to the point of where no evidences of the technology exist?  Again using the wireless communication example, is this not something that is happening before our very eyes, therefore suggesting that it certainly could have happened in the past?
 

 

 

Open Arms

It was an amazing day. 

A few days earlier our plans to have a relaxing ride on the train from Austin up to Oklahoma City, had been derailed by the need to take care of some unexpected foundation repairs at our house in Carrollton.  We were desperately trying to sell the house and any kind of potential issues that came up had to be immediately addressed.  The highlight of the trip was to be the graduation of my twin nieces from high school in Oklahoma City.  Now, instead of a care free ride on the train, we had driven to Dallas and were living in our house again with air mattress beds, hot water and electricity being the only things that resembled the comforts of home living.

The day started out working my ass off trying to make repairs to the house.  I had received a text from my niece in Oklahoma City, on the day we were scheduled to arrive there by train, asking if we had made it yet.  I informed her of the unfortunate news but assured her that we would be there for the graduation.  The new plan was that my son, who lives in the Dallas area, would meet us at the house and we would all ride up to Oklahoma City together and go straight to the venue where the graduation was to take place.  As the time approached for work to stop and preparation for the trip to start, I begin to wonder how my wife and daughter would be received by the former in-laws and their family.  Their grandson was still my son so it couldn't go too bad.  My sons mother, the former Mrs., was also going to be there.  I wasn't too concerned about her as she had met and spoken with my wife at length in the past.  The texts and Facebook messages from the twins indicated that all would be well, but would that be the case with everyone? 

The moment we walked through the door of the venue, we were greeted by the twin's father and were directed over to where the family was seated.  As I turned to look in that direction, they were already standing up and waving for us to come over.  When we arrived at the section each gave a big hug and turned in anticipation of the introduction of my wife and daughter, accepting them at that very moment.  During the ceremony we had almost constant quiet conversation with a couple of the former sister-in-laws setting next to us.  As these conversations were going on, I received a text from one of the twins, while the ceremony was in progress, asking if we had made it.  I answered "yes" and that we were seated behind her grandparents.  About 5 minutes later, as the ceremony continued, I looked in the direction where the twins were seated and both of them began waving to us.

As the ceremony ended and everyone gravitated to the outside, we had the opportunity to hug anyone else that we may have missed at the beginning.  We had several pictures made with the new graduates and each of them was a delight to see, especially since the last time I saw them they were still little girls.  It was decided that we would all meet at a local restaurant down the street to continue the celebration.

At the restaurant the introductions, hugs and handshakes continued.  Everyone was smiling and in a joyful mood.  We sat immediately across the table from my sons mother and her husband and did not feel even the slightest degree of discomfort.  I was enjoying the friendship and camaraderie so much that I don't even remember what I had to eat.  There was just an incredible air of caring and joy all around us.

When there is so much negativity and entirely too much life drama all around, how can something this amazingly positive and sincere happen?  I divorced their daughter/sister/aunt and yet all of them still considered me, and my new family, to be part of their family.  I have felt a lot of happiness in my life but this was the first time I had felt this type of happiness and what an incredible happiness it was.  In this increasingly vengeful society we live in, this was an example of caring and loving for other human beings.  Far too often human individuals take more interest in "being the winner" of a situation or in finding a way to "get even".  Humans can be our own worst enemies and at times it seems that we actually look for ways to make our lives difficult. 

As we were leaving, I spoke to my niece about what her university studies would be and congratulated her once again for having the best grades in her class of over 100 students.  I enjoyed being able to talk to her for a moment and to do so as an adult for the first time. 

Meanwhile, outside the restaurant, my wife had realized who my son's grandmother was and was telling her how much she had heard about her and how she was so glad to finally meet her.  Both were smiling like old friends seeing each other for the first time in years.  Myself, I was smiling for the entire three hour drive back to Dallas.

Just Once

One night several years ago I was ratcheting through the channels on the television and for some reason had paused on this specific channel.  There was an old movie showing about a man that was an airplane crash investigator and there had been a crash that he had been dispatched to investigate.  In the movie he was saying goodbye to his wife and son and his son did not want his father to leave because it was the night of his high school graduation and his father was going to miss it.  The man pats his son on the head and says that he is sorry but he has to go, and then he leaves.

There were many chains of thought that came to mind upon seeing that specific scene in the movie.  Should the man be considered "super dad", off to solve a big airplane crash.  He is probably not "dead-beat dad" that wants nothing to do with his family but that thought did briefly cross my mind.  Perhaps he is "clueless dad" that just doesn't see through his male ego haze clearly enough to have his priorities in order.  Being that the movie was older and therefore from a different era of thinking, it was probably made with the "super dad" mentality.  In today's world the "clueless dad" would probably be more fitting.  Clueless to the needs of his family, especially his son, who was about to celebrate a very successful achievement in life. 

I realized that the direction my chain of thought was leading me was actually not anything new.  I had heard it expressed many times as "you only live once" or other similar expressions.  It had always seemed like a shallow and somewhat rebellious justification type of comment, until now.  As is the case with any word, comment or phrase, the selection of the words that are used in the delivery of the message can make a world of difference.  Sometimes replacing a single word can change the entire thought and feel of a comment or phrase.  If the rebel matter-of-factness is removed from the phrase "you only live once", the phrase would read as follows.  "There are many one-time events in life.  If you miss these events, they are gone and you cannot get them back."

A human being's life is full of events.  Some are natural and most are what we impose on ourselves for various reasons.  There are some events that are routine and repetitive, while other events can be completely random and spontaneous.  It is true that you only live once and if you miss any of those "once in life" events, they are gone forever.

Thoughts About Philanthropy

If you looked up the word "Philanthropy" in Dictionary.com you would find the following definition - "altruistic (unselfish) concern for human welfare and advancement, usually manifested by donations of money, property, or work to needy persons, by endowment of institutions of learning and hospitals, and by generosity to other socially useful purposes."  Sounds exactly like what we imagine in our minds when we hear the word.  Philanthropy is typically a respected thing to do and by performing philanthropic things, a person can add another element of themselves to their professional resume.  Resume?  Does the performance of a philanthropic act allow us to advance professionally?  If so, who is the one actually benefiting from the philanthropy?

There are people out there that are true givers.  These people don't even known why there is a word to describe these acts because to them it is a natural act, something that is simply part of their being.  They feel true compassion, from their souls, for the targets of their actions.  To them it is not a sacrifice they make out of their normal routine, not a quota they need to meet to achieve a goal, nor is it something they do to feel like they are helping and contributing to a better good.  It is just who they are.  Take away the feelings, the money, the sense of achievement or any other motivating factor and these people would still be there doing it.

In the much bigger scope of life, and perhaps specifically for humanity, misplaced philanthropy works against nature.  We have all heard the various clichés such as "a chain is only a strong as its weakest link" and "a herd of buffalo will only move as fast as the slowest buffalo".  These types of theories can also apply to the human race.  The process of natural selection can be healthy for a species.  It allows for that species to rid itself of a certain amount of societal burdens.  The species as a whole is made stronger by allowing the weaker elements to be consumed by the process of natural selection.  Is this cruel thinking?  It is natural, it is life.  Life does not care about equality and fairness but does care about balance.  Life does not care about anything or anyone, but it will let you make out of it anything that you are strong enough to.

Today's societies spend a great deal of energy and resources on encouraging and promoting philanthropy.  Some businesses recommend it to their employees with the implication that it will provide professional growth in the company.  Giving is something that comes from the heart and not all people are interested in supporting the same efforts.  In fact a person may be completely against a certain cause.  In some cases well meaning philanthropic efforts only keep the burdens of society in a position to continue to be a burden.  The same is also true for a number of government programs that only "prop up" the weak and non-contributing elements of society.  In either case this allows for there to be fewer resources available for the advancement of those same societies. 

Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day.  Teach a man to fish and he will eat for a lifetime.

Mystery Journal Page

This was a page believed to be out of a doctors journal that was found blowing down the street.  His name is unknown and the descriptions do not match any local venues, hospitals or individuals.

Earlier tonight I had decided that I wanted to go somewhere where I might be able to see some hot Latin ladies and ended up at a Mexican restaurant on the edge of downtown.  When I walked in there were Mariachis playing and the restaurant had a great ambiance.  Moments later, however, it became obvious to me that there were not any hot Latin ladies at this restaurant and to make things worse, the host was an asshole.  This put me in a really bad mood and caused me to loose my appetite for Mexican food.  Being upset with this jerk at the front door and now feeling a need for some form of vengeance, I thought it would be a good form of expression towards my displeasure if I just ordered a hamburger in a Mexican restaurant. 

The moment I placed my order the entire restaurant fell completely silent.  One of the Mariachis fainted and fell on his horn, which prompted a call to 911.  The manager threatened to throw me out and the other Mariachis demanded that I pay for their compadres horn.  The police showed up and of course it was a pair of Hispanic officers that were on a mission to show the "gringo" a lesson.  Fortunately, I was on call at the emergency room tonight and when my pager activated, I was allowed to escape.  Unfortunately, the reason I was being paged from the emergency room was because that is where the ambulance had taken the Mariachi guy that had fainted and impaled himself on his horn.  The staff was not sure how to approach an incident where there was an embedded horn to be extracted from a mariachi's gut. 

When I arrived there was already a two-foot high pile of little shiny chains and rooster buttons on the floor.  The nurse had a screwdriver trying to pry the Mariachi's cactus belt buckle open, for reasons I am not yet sure about.  We finally got the horn removed from his gut but then discovered that the spot where the horn's mouthpiece was had made his tattoo of the Virgin de Guadalupe look like she had a tongue piercing and was sticking her tongue out.  We called in a local tattoo artist to correct this problem.  The tattoo guy ended up making $5,000 from the family and friends of the Mariachi guy, as well as the emergency room staff.  We all ended up having a good laugh and the Mariachi guy has a hot sister that I hooked up with.  What a night.

Decision Making

Recently a group of us were asked by a newsletter editor, to provide a brief recommendation to the newsletter readers on what they could do to help them advance their careers.  As always, I try to provide thought provoking information for the purpose of allowing all to see that they have the capabilities within them to achieve what they want to achieve.  Evoking mental stimulation is healthy for an individual and will always motivate them to act.  That fits perfectly into what this blog encourages.  Allowing your mind to think the deep thoughts, the "what ifs".  The playing out of downstream events in your mind to help you, in a sense, see into the future and make good decisions based on what you see.  The topic of this posting is to take one point from the advice in the newsletter mentioned above and expand that thought even further.  A lot further.  Lets create some thoughts about decision making and the need for this critical skill to be more prevalent in the world. 

As is the case with any advice, sermon or presentation, the message should be such that a large group of people or in some cases a specific group of people, can identify with what is being said.  The advice that I had listed was done so with the thought that a large group of people could read it, relate to it and hopefully be motivated to take action by it.  The deeper thought in the message however, was directed at a more specific group of people.  A group of people that are often labeled by society as the lower class.  Those who take whatever job they can get with their current and static level of education, attitudes and beliefs about life, and making a living with that job.  Those who only know to do what they are told to do and only do it when they are told to do it and don't know how to notice that it needs doing without someone telling them to do it.  These individuals would never go above and beyond so as to stretch the limits of their physical and mental capacities because they do not know how.  They have grown up both personally and professionally with bad or lacking values and bad influences all around them.  They make bad decisions, if they make one at all, and have the attitude and approach to life that you would find in young teenagers.  A large number of the laws that are made in the world come about due to the fact that a large demographic of people are unable to make good decisions.  When a good decision cannot be made by a group of people, government has to intervene and make those decisions for them. 

Decision Making is one of the most critical skills needed in life and yet is one of the least focused on "core curriculum" items in the educational systems.  The old adages of reading, writing and arithmetic should also include decision making.  If good decision making was more prevalent in humanity, especially as young people are growing up, there would be so many negative aspects of society that would simply fix themselves.  Unplanned pregnancies, drunk driving, unnecessary litigation, jail / prison overcrowding and the list could go on and on.  Imagine all of the tax dollars that are spent in support of these types of problems.  The financial savings would be one of many sources fueling the ROI for having a formal program and core requirement in our schools to educate children on good decision making.

A program such as what is being suggested would lead to a chain reaction but would require a few generations to pass allowing for the chain of ignorance to be broken.  Having children growing up and confidently deciding not to take certain paths in life would be a watershed accomplishment over time.  There would be some work involved in setting up a 10 or 12 year educational program but once that is done and the program started, all other benefits would happen naturally over time, through attrition, just as so many natural things in life occur.

Going Postal?

I received 3 letters in the mail today that were delivered to the wrong address.  It is usually only 1 or 2 a month.  That doesn't sound too bad but then the mathematical wheels in my brain start to churn and questions begin to work their way to the surface.  If I am getting 1 or 2 letters a month that were actually supposed to be delivered somewhere else, is there a chance that some of the mail that was supposed to come to my address is being delivered somewhere else?  The answer is, "of course".

So, how many pieces of mail that were addressed to me are ending up in someone else's mail box?   How can a company expect that once they put a bill in the mail box, the bill payer is responsible for it?

Lets be conservative and say that I only get 1 piece of mail erroneously delivered to my mailing address each month.  That would be 12 pieces each year (very conservative number).  There are 30 houses on my street.  Now we are up to 360 pieces of mail that are delivered to the wrong address annually.  There are at least 200 homes in this subdivision.  That multiplies out to 2,400 pieces of mail that are showing up at the wrong address each year in 1 small subdivision in Austin Texas.  A statistic from USPS.com states that they have 152.9 billion delivery points.  Going back to my conservative count of 12 pieces of mail that are not delivered to the right address annually, that calculates out to approximately 1.8 trillion pieces of mail that are delivered to the wrong address each year. That is a lot and yes there is a larger number that do make it to the correct address but that is not the point of this thought.

The point to this thought is not to offend anyone working for the U.S. Postal Service, although it probably will, (hence the term) but instead to show how you can not just toss a letter, payment, invoice or anything into the mail box and assume it is going to get there.  The system does not perform at that expected / assumed / taken for granted, level of capability.  Certainly not for businesses that want to hold customers accountable, for something that they are assuming the customer is aware of, simply because the business tossed a notification letter into a mailbox somewhere.  There are a very large number of mail items that do not get to their intended destination.
 
The check may very well be in the mail and it just never made it to where it was supposed to go.


05/01/16 - Some Things Never Change

(Response to a text message that the item had been delivered. )  
This item was not delivered as reported.  I have not received it.

Thanks,

Joe

(Their response back requesting me to go look for the package that was supposed to be delivered to my address.)

Hello! 

We are very sorry for the issue you're having. Please note this item was shipped via USPS Priority Mail. The tracking online shows that your package delivered on 04/21/16. Please carefully check with your neighbors, any front office, lockboxes, or anywhere your mail might be left. 

Here is a link for the tracking showing the delivery of the item: 

www.xxxyyyzzz.com

Please follow up with your local post office and/or your regular mail carrier if you're still unable to locate your item. 

We hope this information is helpful! 

Thanks! 

7th Avenue Costumes 800-704-9684 
Monday through Friday 
9 am to 6 pm EST


(My response back.  They refunded me the money but I would have much preferred to have recieved the merchandise.)

Thanks for your response.  The postal service is a completely unreliable resource and they prove this to us all over and over again.  A business cannot just put something in the postal services care and then expect them to be an extension of that business's commitment to their customers.  They simply do not have a customer service culture and based on my experiences and observations, their culture is exactly the opposite of what a business needs.

I need the product that I purchased from your company.  You assumed that the USPS would complete the transaction on your behalf.  They apparently did not do so.  I paid you for the product and you are responsible for getting the product to me, the customer.  

Please send me another order and ship it in a manner that it will arrive by Wednesday of this week and I would like the shipping to be paid for by your organization.  

Regards,

Joe McLaughlin 

Relationships

There is a portion of a safety training program that describes the steps to take in order to safely lift or set down an object.  The first step in the description is to "size up the load" or to look over what you are about to lift so you have an idea of what is about to happen and what needs to be done to prepare for what is about to happen.  Basically that step is saying, "know what are you about to get yourself into".

This is a step on performing a safe lift but it really applies to a great many things in life both professionally and personally.  How many times have people gotten themselves into situations that they wish they had not.  How many times would those same people have made a different decision, than the one that was made and had caused them this grief and suffering, had they known ahead of time what they were getting themselves into.  Furthermore, did they even spend any time at all investigating the situation that they were about to enter into.  In the majority of cases, probably not.

Relationships can have a major impact on an individuals life.  They can last only a few moments or can last for a lifetime.  They can be positive and healthy for all involved or they can be a never-ending hell.  A healthy and positive relationship can develop out of a momentary event or out of long term event.  Likewise a hellish and unhealthy relationship can develop out of a momentary event or out of a long term event. 

The point is that there is no set formula that "just happens" anytime an individual enters into a relationship.  The chances of living a life in pleasure are just as likely as the chances of living a life in pain.  If a person wants to live a good life with as little pain as possible, they owe it to themselves to spend some time and evaluate the relationship before they step into it.

An evaluation that considers the long term consequences that are at stake is always necessary.  Long term considerations such as an unexpected pregnancy and what if that pregnancy results in a child with some form of a disability.  What about an incurable sexually transmitted disease that puts the brakes on all romance and renders the person socially useless.  Then there are the individuals that put on a great show only for it to come to light later that they are physically abusive.  Who are the families that this person comes from?  Might they have a family history of alcoholism, drug addiction or child abuse.  These are all negative examples and only have a 50% chance of being realized but is it wise to wager a life with these kinds of odds?

A equally serious consideration that has to be taken into account is the mental stability of the person you are considering a relationship with.  Does the person have a problem handling rejection and feels that chaining their unwilling subject to a cold metal chair in their dark wet basement is a way to ensure that their subject will always be theirs to keep.  The mind is a mysterious thing and even more mysterious in individuals that are not mentally stable.  Murder suicide would also be something to consider from this type of person.  Again, these are all negative examples and only have a 50% chance of being realized, but is it worth taking that chance?  Investigate and evaluate before doing anything of a deep or serious relational nature with anyone.

So we end almost in the same place as we started -

Relationship Step #1 - Know what you are getting yourself into.